Human Concepts are Annoying
by KarinaKamichi
Summary: 'Human concepts' are confusing, and can be downright annoying for a Shinigami, but humans and Shinigami have one thing in common. They do, and always will, have emotions. Everyone has limits in patience, especially when it comes to misunderstandings with Juice. Urahara knows something that poor old Byakuya does not. Warning: Some minor swearing, and slight Uryu angst. Plz R&R.


**Story:****_ Human Concepts are Annoying_**

**Summary:****_ 'Human concepts' are confusing, and can be downright annoying for a Shinigami, but humans and Shinigami have one thing in common. They do, and always will, have emotions. Everyone has limits in patience, especially when it comes to misunderstandings with Juice. Urahara knows this all too well, poor old Byakuya does not. _**

**Warnings:_ Some minor swearing, and slight Uryu angst._**

**Disclaimer: ****_I don't own Bleach._**

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Ikkaku, Yumichika, Yoruichi, Ichigo, Rukia, Renji, and Byakuya had all taken a break from their duties in Karakura town. After the last few long and stressful days of scouting the area, they were finally able to set at ease. They'd each been offered a bagged lunch, prepared by Urahara, himself, as 'a token of his appreciation'. Surprisingly, nobody had refused it, except for Uryu, Chad, and Orihime, who excused themselves, saying they'd already decided to eat elsewhere.

Ichigo couldn't restrain himself from scowling, when one of those said people, a certain Quincy, gave a rather rude comment, before pushing up his glasses, immediately leaving the shop before anyone would have the opportunity to speak back or stop him.

It's not like he could blame him, though. A single Sunflower that stands alone in a patch of clovers tends to stand out, just as having no family, no friends; not a single person you feel you can relate to, can cause you to believe you're alone in the world, and that that's exactly how it's suppose to be; to not be noticed. To not be seen, nor heard.

Several times in the past, Ichigo had found himself smirking without even realizing it, as he pondered how stubborn Uryu could be sometimes._'Honestly, that Ishida keeps saying he's our enemy, but the way I see it, his actions are always proving nothing but the opposite... That guy...'_

Only the ones who knew his situation, and had had time to get to know him, personally, were the only ones able to sympathize with him. Even Renji didn't get why, that, at one moment, he was helping them, and fighting for his life; the other, he avoided them all together – he'd heard things, here and there, but still had never been able to fully piece it all together.

Gazing around, Urahara took notice of their confusion and worry.

"Sorry about that, guys. I hope you don't intend to hold that against him - I guarantee he means no harm." he gave one of his signature smiles, as stepped over to Byakuya, casually holding a white paper bag and a small box (_carton?_), which contained a picture of an apple. This was an item of which he'd never seen. He stared down at it, hesitant to move a muscle, for the fear of embarrassing himself; For the fear of ruining his reputation, and delicate pride. _What was he suppose to do?_

He glanced over, a little surprised, to see that almost every person in the room were now seated. Eating. They all had apparently figured it out. _'Even,'_ he felt his stomach dropped, a blob of orange in the corners of his eyes. The sight of that bright orange hair threatened to blind him, every day he had to see it, it always angered him. Strange thing was, that anger was not directed towards Ichigo, rather, himself. _'Kurosaki Ichigo...A lowly human... Substitute Shinigami...'_ While everyone else's moods seemed to have lighted up, he was still lost and confused, and hurting as well, but his 'stone cold' expression would never allow him to show it.

Everyone felt a chill run down their spine, when a swift look of realization swept over Ikkaku's face. Any person who was speaking immediately cut themselves off. A terribly disturbing, and bone chilling _(could it even be called one?)_ grin, that could easily compare to Captain Zaraki's famous 'sign that he was happy', slowly crept up on his face. He now recalled that he still had some unfinished 'business' with a certain group of teenagers and kids. "Defected 'crystal ball', am I?! I'll give_them_a _'fortune'!_ They won't dare to forget the name 'Madarame Ikkaku', once I'm through engraving into memory..."

The only ones who didn't _seem_ affected by the sudden, and rather unpleasant, change in his reiatsu, as his hand slowly found it's way to the hilt of his Zanpakuto, was Yumichika, Yoruichi, and Byakuya, of course. Ichigo gulped inwardly, then gave a scowl.

"What the hell's his problem...?" he grumbled, glancing over at Yumichika. "No offence; your friend is weird."

Yumichika sighed, lifting a hand to hold his hair back. "I had better go after him, before anything ugly happens."

Nobody said anything; it was a known fact that not a single person in the entire Soul Society would even _think_ of questioning Ikkaku; he was a mere reflection of Kempachi when it came to dares. Hell, they'd probably even blow up every inch of the walls of Seireitei, if they were, in anyway 'doubted' the matter.

Urahara turned his gaze back, taking notice of Byakuya's silence, and at that point, he expected no words. He gave a small sigh, as if preparing to speak, however, much to his surprise, he was stopped by a slightly hesitant, but none-the-less firm, voice, that you wouldn't get to hear everyday, _especially_ from someone such as Kuchiki Byakuya.

"Might I ask what that is?" the noble gestured at the box being held in front of him. His eye may have twitched, but in just the slightest.

"Eh?" the Former-Soul Reaper followed Byakuya's gaze to the juice box, before his face lit up. "Oh, I forgot! You've only been to the World of the Living a couple of times in you life so you are probably not familiar with 'condensed packaging' are you? I'm sure you've heard of Potato Chips, or Cup-'o-Noodles, right? Or even canned vegetables. Pumpkin pie? Breakfast bars?"

Byakuya's brow twitched in irritation, his head swarming with never ending questions. _Cup-'o-Noodles?_ What was the point of pouring noodles into a cup, when there is bowl there for that purpose? _Potato Chips?_ He supposed they could be used, but they would mix the same, so what was the purpose?_ Canned Vegetables?_ He didn't even _want_ to know. _A breakfast bar?_ Who did Kisuke think he was? The fact of being the Head of the Honorable Kuchiki Clan, on _top_ of being a Captain, was all the more reason, not to get drunk in the morning, as it would only guarantee disaster by the end of the day, and not only the Kuchiki Clan's reputation would be screwed, but the names of both his sister, and beloved wife would be shamed.

Then it occurred to him. In all honesty, what did this have to with what the unidentified item in Kisuke's hand?

"Urahara, I asked you a question." he spoke, as a-matter-of-factly. "Being as such, bringing up irrelevant matters does not give an answer. Therefore, it is pointless. Do not play with me."

"Ah," Urahara held up an index finger, the white bag still in his grip, as a smile spread across his face. "but that's where you're mistaken, Kuchiki-sama. Every question, regardless of how relevant they may seem at the moment, can allow you to have a better understanding of those around you in future."

Byakuya was surprisingly silent, giving no remark, before Urahara waved his hand dismissively.

"Now that that's out the way, how about letting me tell you what this is."

Byakuya could only stare.

Again. More Silence. _Dead_ silence.

Finally Urahara breathed in. "This is..."

_Staring. Studying. _

"Juice." Urahara smiled big. "Here. Enjoy."

_Shock. Disappointment._

Byakuya stared down at the 'juice' and the bagged lunch in disbelief. Disbelief that soon turned to shock, then anger, and then rage. Foul raietsu swarmed around him. That _traitor_ had been testing him, he was sure. He'd left him hanging, and confused. That box was not juice. It _couldn't_ be, for it was solid.

Part of his old self was threatening to take over. _Damn you, Urahara Kisuke... Damn you, to the deepest pits of hell..._

_~ End of Story ~_

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**A/N:****_ What do you think? Review._**


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